Category: Musings

Some old reminders for a New Year!

“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Buddhist quote.

A number of thoughts and experiences came together to prompt the writing of this Post.  It’s a much longer and more reflective post than usual but is offered in the loving hope that there can be no caring without sharing.

Firstly, good American friends, Gordon and Linda, whom Jean and I got to know in Mexico, recently sent us a Happy New Year

George Carlin

email, that included a slide presentation entitled Philosophy of Old Age.  It was based on the writings and wisdom of George Carlin, one of the all-time great comedians of the world.  But George Carlin (1937-2008) was much more than a great comedian.  Much of his humour was a playful but very sharp form of social commentary on the ‘big world’.  (P.S. George Carlin’s website is here, a rather strange experience in the sense of a virtual life after death.)

Anyway, back to the slide presentation from Gordon and Linda.

The slide presentation felt worthy of a post on Learning from Dogs but, thankfully, it was available in a better format for a WordPress Blog, a YouTube video.  Here it is.

You can see that there are some very deep but simple messages about what, in the end, are the really important things in life.  Top of the list is ‘love’.  Especially unconditional love.

That takes me to second element of what motivated me to write this piece.

Just 14 days ago, I participated in a memorial service described as ‘A Memorial Service For the Lives of Loved Ones Lost‘ at our local St Paul’s Episcopal Church here in Payson.  The idea came out of a comment from friend, mentor and fellow Blog author, Jon Lavin, who had noted that the language that I used when speaking of my father, now dead for well over 50 years, was the language of a child who hadn’t been ‘released’ from that event (I was just 12 at the time) rather than that of an adult who accepts that death is part of the natural order of the world.

Losing a loved one is tough, incredibly tough, and full of pain and anguish in a very deep-seated and personal manner.  That’s the perspective from the loved ones left behind with more life ahead of them.  But if one thinks of it in reverse, what is the one thing that we would want to leave behind when we die?

It is, without doubt, that our death does not leave in the hearts and souls of those left behind, whom we loved and who loved us, pain and anguish that isn’t embraced and dealt with healthily.

It was that collective unresolved pain and anguish that brought all of us together at that Service on the 20th.  It was a wonderful release for all present.  During the Service the Advent Wreath candles were lit.  Here are selection of the thoughts that were voiced and released as the four candles were lit.

This first candle we light is to remember those whom we have loved and lost.  We pause to remember their name, their face, their voice, the memory that binds them to us in this season.

This second candle we light is to redeem the pain of loss; the loss of relationships, the loss of jobs, the loss of health.  We pause to gather up the pain of the past and offer it to God, asking that from God’s hands we receive the gift of peace.

This third candle we light is to remember ourselves this Christmas time.  We pause and remember these past weeks and months and years; the disbelief, the anger, the down times, the poignancy of reminiscing, the hugs and handshakes of family and friends, all those who stood with us.

This fourth candle is lit to remember our faith and the gift of hope which the Christmas story offers us.

Light defeats darkness.

Go back and see those words that accompanied the lighting of the third candle. It included “to remember ourselves“. Once again, it’s loving ourselves, accepting that we spend our lives doing our best; in other words the answers to the unresolved issues that can haunt us is simple acceptance of who you are and being at peace with you!

Now I’m conscious that this is running on a bit but I pray that this is reaching out to others – we all need better clarity at times in our lives.  So before I go on to the third and last element which has me in front of this keyboard, let me share what I wrote, privately, a few days before the Service on the 20th in trying to make sense of my own feelings about the loss of my father.

    If we don’t embrace who we are and why we are who we are, i.e. real self awareness, we are condemned to being emotionally dysfunctional to a greater or lesser degree for a long time.  If we understand and love ourselves, avoiding the ‘easy’ route of constantly reminding ourselves what is ‘wrong’ with us, not being a victim to guilt, and on and on, then we see a better, softer, more loving world though our eyes.  Then the world reflecting back what we think about most rewards us with a better, softer, more loving world. 

    Loving ourselves, letting go, opening our arms to peace and joy is the true gift that we have really been given by the ‘loss’ of the loved one.

What I am embracing is that the emotional consequences of my father’s death, all those many, many years ago, created degrees of emotional dysfunction that went on for far too long.  Being free to walk clear of those emotional ‘hooks’ is not only so much better for me and those who love me, it is exactly what my father would have wanted!

Being clear of deep emotional burdens allows us to love ourselves and from that comes the greatest personal gift of all – unconditional love for others.  There’s that love word again!

OK, now to the third and final element!  Wake up at the back there!

The year 2010 was for me and Jean the epitome of a joyous journey that started, coincidentally, on a December 20th, this one in 2007.  On that evening in a bar/nightclub in San Carlos, Mexico, six days after I had arrived to stay with friends who had known Jean for many years, that I asked Jean for a dance, put my arm around her waist, and experienced something mystical – I knew she was the woman I would love to my last breath.

Thirty-five months later, on November 20th 2010, Jean and I were married in St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, Payson, Arizona.  We had been living together in Mexico since September 2008 and in Payson since February, 2010.  In Payson we have found a wonderfully interesting, generous and supportive community and our 13 dogs just love our rural home tucked into the forest; it is a very beautiful existence.

Frankly, I find it almost impossible to get my head around in any rational way as to how life can be so randomly alluring – we really have so little control over it all!  Save for how we accept and love ourselves.  Thus my own haltering and challenging steps to better self-awareness have given me more than I could ever have dreamed of.  This realisation has left me feeling pretty emotional over the Christmas period.

From those emotions has come, for the first time in my life, the awareness of mortality.  Not in some sort of intellectual homage to the notion that it doesn’t go on forever.  No, this is a real, hard-edged, realisation that I am going to die! It’s a clear vision, as clear as those beautiful stars shining out from the brittle cold, night sky over Payson very early on New Year’s Day. My mortal life is going to end.

And that, my dear readers is that.  Go back and watch that video from George Carlin, think about those past loved ones in your life and what they gifted you and, above all, feel your own love for you, savour it, and share it around.

“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Buddhist quote.

Happy New Year greetings from Jon!

Just wanted to add my best wishes to all Learning from Dog readers to those of Paul from yesterday.

Plus I did want to expand, just a touch, on what Paul wrote yesterday, more or less reflecting on an article by Leo Babauta.  In that post, Paul quoted Leo writing:

The thing I’ve learned, and it’s not some new truth but an old one that took me much too long to learn, is that if you learn to be content with who you are and where you are in life, it changes everything.

In a very real sense what Leo is saying is that if you don’t love yourself you can’t possibly ‘love’ the world around you.  Now this is incredibly easy to consider, too easy in fact, because the truth of loving oneself first is, for the vast majority of people, a complex, confusing and unclear journey, as in ‘self-journey’.  Read that quote from Leo again and see how he writes, ‘an old one [as in truth] that took me much too long to learn‘.

I’m sure when Leo writes ‘too long to learn‘ he is, in effect, acknowledging the very individual circumstances that lead to a person developing the awareness that is expressed in that quote ‘if you learn to be content with who you are and where you are in life, it changes everything‘.

So if 2011 is going to be a challenging year then hang on to the only rock in your life – yourself!  Embrace the reality that you, like all of us, do your best.  Be good and kind to you.

Happy New Year

By Jon Lavin

2011!

A very Happy New Year to everyone!

I started writing this new Post on the 30th December with my mind full of predictions of a terribly difficult year ahead for millions of people.  Indeed, there is no question that there are endless accounts of what calamities may be ahead of us in this New Year.  But, as is said, it is what it is!  The challenge, as always, is how we deal with it.  As my fellow author, Jon, has often said, “The world reflects back what we think about most!”

In other words how we relate to the exterior world is really, and fundamentally, a reflection of how we relate to ourselves.  Jon has penned a few words on this theme for tomorrow.

But serendipitously I came across a nice piece on Leo Babauta’s blog, Zen Habits called ‘you’re already perfect’.  The link to it is here.

Here are some extracts:

A lot of people come to Zen Habits (and read other personal development blogs and books) because they want to improve something about themselves. They’re not satisfied with their lives, they’re unhappy with their bodies, they want to be better people.

I know, because I was one of those people.

This desire to improve myself and my life was one of the things that led to Zen Habits. I’ve been there, and I can say that it leads to a lot of striving, and a lot of dissatisfaction with who you are and what your life is.

A powerful realization that has helped me is simply this: You’re already good enough, you already have more than enough, and you’re already perfect.

and later Leo writes:

The thing I’ve learned, and it’s not some new truth but an old one that took me much too long to learn, is that if you learn to be content with who you are and where you are in life, it changes everything.

Consider what changes:

  • You no longer feel dissatisfied with yourself or your life.
  • You no longer spend so much time and energy wanting to change and trying to change.
  • You no longer compare yourself to other people, and wish you were better.
  • You can be happy, all the time, no matter what happens in the world around you.
  • Instead of trying to improve yourself, you can spend your time helping others.
  • You stop spending so much money on things that will supposedly improve your life.

Read the full article here, and ponder.

And have a very, very happy (and perfect) New Year.

 

Or a song or three?

A few days ago I published an article that had first appeared on the CASSE Blog site entitled Top Ten Songs for a Steady State.  A long-term contributor to this Blog, Per Kurowski, then added a comment to that post that I thought deserved being made into a separate item on Learning from Dogs.  Here it is.

This is also a contender:

Where Do the Children Play?
Cat Stevens, Tea for the Tillerman (1970)

Well I think it’s fine, building jumbo planes.
Or taking a ride on a cosmic train.
Switch on summer from a slot machine.
Yes, get what you want to if you want, ’cause you can get anything.

Chorus: I know we’ve come a long way,
We’re changing day to day,
But tell me, where do the children play?

Well you roll on roads over fresh green grass.
For your lorry loads pumping petrol gas.
And you make them long, and you make them tough.
But they just go on and on, and it seems that you can’t get off.

Well you’ve cracked the sky, scrapers fill the air.
But will you keep on building higher
’til there’s no more room up there?
Will you make us laugh, will you make us cry?
Will you tell us when to live, will you tell us when to die?

By the way the following song should also classify as a contender… though excuse me if when I also use music to keep sane… I might drive others insane

http://ayearofsongs.blogspot.com/2010/06/color-of-wind.html

Thanks Per!

Basic geometry

North-West Europe’s Winter weather.

As I write this article, the temperature in London (it’s 5pm on Tuesday 14th.) is 4 deg C/ 38 F heading down to a forecast -2 deg C/28 F overnight.  Similarly cold temperatures are forecast during the rest of the week.

Here’s something that was published in October:

Coldest winter in 1,000 years on its way

04 October, 2010, 22:20

After the record heat wave this summer, Russia’s weather seems to have acquired a taste for the extreme.

Forecasters say this winter could be the coldest Europe has seen in the last 1,000 years.

The change is reportedly connected with the speed of the Gulf Stream, which has shrunk in half in just the last couple of years. Polish scientists say that it means the stream will not be able to compensate for the cold from the Arctic winds. According to them, when the stream is completely stopped, a new Ice Age will begin in Europe.

So far, the results have been lower temperatures: for example, in Central Russia, they are a couple of degrees below the norm.

“Although the forecast for the next month is only 70 percent accurate, I find the cold winter scenario quite likely,” Vadim Zavodchenkov, a leading specialist at the Fobos weather center, told RT. “We will be able to judge with more certainty come November. As for last summer’s heat, the statistical models that meteorologists use to draw up long-term forecasts aren’t able to predict an anomaly like that.”

In order to meet the harsh winter head on, Moscow authorities are drawing up measures to help Muscovites survive the extreme cold.

Read the rest of the article here.

So why the heading for this Post, as in Basic Geometry?

Because places on the Globe are measured using Latitude and Longitude.  Let’s look at the Latitude of some places:

London 51°30′N

Calgary, Alberta 51°03′N

Kiev, Ukraine 50°27′N

Krakow, Poland 50°03′N

Now let’s look at those Cities again with the current temperatures (you have to accept the local time differences):

London 51°30′N +4 deg C

Calgary, Alberta 51°03′N -9 deg C

Kiev, Ukraine 50°27′N -6 deg C

Krakow, Poland 50°03′N -12 deg C

In other words, Britain enjoys, or should enjoy, a much warmer Winter than most other places of the same or similar latitudes because of the effect of the Gulf Stream.

Just a muse!

By Paul Handover

 

 


Future for Societies

The glass is filled half-way.  Is it half-full or half-empty?

This is a rhetorical question, of course.  It is what comes to mind as I write this simply because of a small half-full/half-empty experience in the last 10 minutes.  Let me explain.

I had started watching a video on TED.com.  This one was entitled Jared Diamond on why societies collapse.  Within a few minutes I started drifting to the comments, and read:

Jared Diamond talks of how societies choose (unwittingly) to collapse. William McDonough with his Cradle to Cradle concept also talks about choices and provides ‘Love of all children of all species for all time’ as a positive conscious choice.

With goals or missions in place (for example profit for businesses) humans have achieved amazing things.

So what would happen if all groups, families and individuals followed a mission of ‘Love of all children of all species for all time’?

I rather liked that.  We always have choices. A positive conscious choice is always better.

So I stopped the Jared Diamond lecture and found the William McDonough one, also on TED.com, and conveniently shared on YouTube.  It’s just 20 minutes long, so settle down somewhere, perhaps with a glass filled half-way with something!

By Paul Handover

Veritas Publishing

Note: the next 10 days are pretty challenging, in the most positive and beautiful way, as Jean and I are to be married at Payson Episcopal Church on Saturday afternoon and we have guests until the 29th.  There will always be a daily post from either me or Jon but do forgive us if they are not of the usual longer reflective style.

Dr. David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D.

Both Jon and I have written about Dr Hawkins many times in Learning from Dogs.  But there is also a plethora of valuable material available from the organisation, Veritas Publishing, that is the wrapper, so to speak, around David Hawkins work.

His monthly newsletter is free and often very interesting.  For example, in the one that arrived today, there are a couple of extracts from his October lecture that resonate very closely with what Jon published about Eckhart Tolle the previous two days.

“The Self knows.  The mind thinks.  The thinking is just added as a thrill.  Thinking is a thrill and an entertainment.  Can you get along without thinking?  There is a chair.  I don’t think about the chair but I know it’s there.  Most of real knowingness goes on without thinking.  The animal knows without thinking.  It just knows right off the bat who is a friend and who is a burglar.”

“Make choices instead of craving and desire and clutching.  Choose to be happy instead of craving what you don’t have.  Give up all cravingness.  ‘I cannot be happy unless I get to do this or that.’  You are putting happiness as outside of yourself.  The source of happiness is within.  Winning $1 million does not make a big change in your life.  Surrender all cravings to God.”

And do watch this:

Finally, I have repeated a publication today of a post written about Truth published earlier on Learning from Dogs in September.  It has come out at the same time as this Post.

By Paul Handover

Thinking about Truth

(A copy of the original post published earlier in September on this Blog)

Dr David Hawkins writing about truth

One of the many strange consequences of leaving the United Kingdom in 2008 leading, eventually, to settling in Arizona is that we are within a half-day’s car ride of Sedona. Sedona is where Dr. David R Hawkins is based.

Dr. David R Hawkins

Dr. David Hawkins is a life member of the American Psychiatric Association but is best known for his research into “the hidden determinants of human behavior”. That quote is taken from the front cover of Hawkins’ seminal book, Power vs. Force.

Dr. Hawkins was Knighted by the Danish Crown for this work in 1996, a worthy recognition, it seems to me.

I have been reading Power vs. Force for some weeks now. Normally I devour a book, fiction or non-fiction, if it holds my interest. But this book is different! Power vs. Force contains so many profound teachings that frequently there is more than enough to take in from a single page, or even just a couple of paragraphs. To read on before a particular proposition has had time to invade and penetrate one’s deeper senses is almost painful.

The challenge in wanting to share some of these teachings is having the patience to finish the book before putting pen to paper, so to speak. I failed!

In one of the early chapters, Hawkins writes about “the intrinsic source of power and how it operates.” There are a couple of paragraphs that just punched out from the page. Here they are, interwoven with my thoughts:

In looking for the source of power we have noted that it is associated with meaning, and this meaning has to do with the significance of life itself. Force is concrete, literal and arguable. It requires proof and support. The sources of power, however, are inarguable and are not subject to proof. The self-evident is not arguable.

Just at this point, one might have forgiven me for being slightly skeptical. How can the ‘self-evident’ or anything be above argument? Especially if one reflects on the notion that all we perceive with our senses is an illusion, a product of our minds. I clearly recall having this fleeting thought at this point in the paragraph. But the eyes continued to the next sentence and, figuratively, I was gasping for breath. Remember I had just read, “The self-evident is not arguable.” This was what came next:

That health is more important than disease, that life is more important than death, that honor is preferable to dishonor, that faith and trust are preferable to doubt and cynicism, that the constructive is preferable to the destructive – all are self-evident statements not subject to proof. Ultimately, the only thing we can say about a source of power is that it just “is”.

Wow! Those few sentences stopped me in my tracks. Think about what Hawkins is saying. He is saying that we intuitively know, without the need of intellectual argument or ‘proof’, the rightness, the beauty, the perfection of some deeply fundamental concepts.

It’s as if from the earliest moments of human awareness, gravity, sunlight, night and day, for example, were obvious despite eons of time needing to pass before science could ’explain’ these aspects of life.

In other words, there are understandings that are deeply embedded in human consciousness. Hawkins continues:

Every civilization is characterized by native principles. If the principles of a civilization are noble, it succeeds; if they are selfish, it falls. As a term, “principles” may sound abstract, but the consequences of principles are quite concrete. If we examine principles we will see that they reside in an invisible realm within consciousness itself. Although we can point out examples of honesty in the world, honesty itself as an organizing principle central to civilization is nowhere independently existent in the external world. True power, then, emanates from consciousness itself; what we see is a visible manifestation of the invisible.

Phew! True power emanates from consciousness itself!

It’s now 2 days since I read that. It still reverberates within my mind. I was compelled to share it with you. And it reverberates for me in an even clearer form – truth emanates from consciousness itself! Stay with me just a while longer.

A very well-known magical attribute of the human brain is what goes on in the sub-conscious, our ‘back-office’. Give our brain some space to process a dilemma such as deciding what to do for the best and it does come up with what is best for us. Often the best space we can provide for our brain is a good night’s sleep. It’s common folklore to ‘sleep’ on a problem.

My co-founder of Learning from Dogs, Jon Lavin, says that often in sleep we find the truth. I think the same could be said for prayer, as in a spiritual sense more than in a religious sense.

Just reflect again on the power of what comes out from those two paragraphs. Truth is not something external to us; it is within us, all the time. Our level of consciousness is the key to this truth. Our self-awareness is the tool by which we understand our level of consciousness – our mirror to our soul.

This is truly life-changing!

By Paul Handover

Eckhart Tolle postscript

That little more, as promised.

Yesterday, I wrote about Eckhart and included the extract on Manifestation.  Rather than cloud what was presented yesterday with more material, I held it over until today.

All I wanted to do was to draw your attention to Eckhart’s website, which is here – do spend some time going through what’s on offer – and I wanted to include this video of Eckhart speaking about Being Yourself.

But before you click the play button for the video, just listen to the words without having any reactions to how the words are presented, the accent of the speaker or anything else.  You’ll understand when the video starts running.  Just close your eyes and listen deeply to what is being said.

By Jon Lavin

Everything revolves around love.

This is not corny, this is at the heart of everything in life.

Nearly a month ago, I wrote a piece called The Power of Love.  It was offered as a logical argument in favour of love – read it if you want to see what was written.

In line with the general Blog theme on here that we have much to learn from dogs and unconditional love is the BIG lesson we should take from these noble animals, here’s a lovely story that was sent to me by a dear friend.

WHOEVER DID THIS IS A VERY BEAUTIFUL PERSON

The ‘whoever’ being someone at a dead letter office within the US Postal System.

Here’s how it goes.

Our 14 year old dog, Abbey, died last month. The day after she died, my 4 year old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey.. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her. I told her that I thought we could so she dictated these words:

Abbey and Meredith

Dear God,
Will you please take care of my dog? She died yesterday and is with you in heaven. I miss her very much. I am happy that you let me have her as my dog even though she got sick.
I hope you will play with her.. She likes to play with balls and to swim. I am sending a picture of her so when you see her You will know that she is my dog. I really miss her.
Love, Meredith

We put the letter in an envelope with a picture of Abbey and Meredith and addressed it to God/Heaven. We put our return address on it.. Then Meredith pasted several stamps on the front of the envelope because she said it would take lots of stamps to get the letter all the way to heaven. That afternoon she dropped it into the letter box at the post office. A few days later, she asked if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had.

Yesterday, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on our front porch addressed, ‘To Meredith’ in an unfamiliar hand.. Meredith opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers called, ‘When a Pet Dies..’ Taped to the inside front cover was the letter we had written to God in its opened envelope. On the opposite page was the picture of Abbey &Meredith and this note:

Dear Meredith,
Abbey arrived safely in heaven.
Having the picture was a big help. I recognized Abbey right away.
Abbey isn’t sick anymore. Her spirit is here with me just like it stays in your heart. Abbey loved being your dog. Since we don’t need our bodies in heaven, I don’t have any pockets to keep your picture in, so I am sending it back to you in this little book for you to keep and have something to remember Abbey by..
Thank you for the beautiful letter and thank your mother for helping you write it and sending it to me. What a wonderful mother you have. I picked her especially for you.
I send my blessings every day and remember that I love you very much.
By the way, I’m easy to find, I am wherever there is love.

Love,
God

[The book is available on Amazon here. I have no financial interest in providing you with the link. Ed.]

Thanks Julie for sending that in – it’s a very moving example of unconditional love and generosity.

By Paul Handover