Learning from Dogs

Dogs are integrous animals. We have much to learn from them.

Playing with words

with 4 comments

Just something silly for the week-end, with thanks to John H. for forwarding it.

 

When chemists die, they barium.

I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.

Velcro — what a rip off!

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

The recent earthquake in Washington,DC was obviously the government’s fault.

About these ads

Written by Paul Handover

May 6, 2012 at 00:00

4 Responses

Subscribe to comments with RSS.

  1. These are fantastic. Thanks to John H. did they come from Steward Francis?

    I am working on my own compilation of humorous quotations regarding psychiatrists and therapy, such as: “Insanity is a state of mind” (Alan Alda).

    Martin Lack

    May 6, 2012 at 10:22

    • Oh, what a fabulous clip! Thank you so much.

      But the source of the above I know no more than they came from John H., right here in Payson.

      Best of luck on your own compilation, Paul

      Paul Handover

      May 6, 2012 at 15:45

  2. [...] post is also inspired by a recent post on Paul Handover’s Learning from Dogs, entitled ‘Playing with words’, which is an amazing collection of unattributed sayings, to which one could very easily add Mark [...]


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,078 other followers

%d bloggers like this: